Dear The Yellow Pages, Did you seriously just appear on my front porch yesterday? Seriously? Who still uses you? There’s a new thing that has replaced you. It’s called the internet.
Dear WB, Stop pulling my hair. Just stop. It hurts. At the very least, when I am moving your hand away, don’t just giggle at me. Because it makes me laugh and you pull my hair again and it goes on and on and on. Like a game. That’s only fun for you.
Dear The Federal Government, This sequester is getting out of hand. How about instead of leaving work early yesterday, you all get together and agree on something to fix this issue?
Dear GLOSSYBOX Canada, I got at look at your February box yesterday and it was nothing short of amazing. Those GLOSSYBOX cupcake papers? Yeah, I’ll take those in my box next month.
Dear L, This is the weekend you’ve been waiting for for ages! Yes, ice skating lessons start. I cannot wait to watch you learn to skate in your cute little hockey skates .
Dear The Fancy, I get that the February Pink Fancy Box I ordered back in January is delayed. And I’m cool with that. However, I am NOT cool with you billing me for the March one this week. And then when I e-mailed you about this, you acted like I didn’t get how monthly subscription boxes worked. No dude, I get it. I pay You send me a box. I pay again. You send me another box. Not, I pay. I pay again. And you send me nothing.
Dear B, I am so glad you were not home yesterday to observe me running all over the house looking for my iPhone before the kids and I left for our day of fun. I can only imagine how annoyed you would have been. It’s times like this I wish we had a home phone so I could call myself. Over and over again until I found it.